A Veteran’s Concern on Trends in Homeschooling
Over the last year, I have noticed a great increase in homeschoolers who blog. I have spent a lot of time perusing these blogs , and happily finding more and more each week. It is exciting as one so committed to homeschooling to see so many others realizing the benefits of the lifestyle for their families.
But lately, I have been struck by some trends that concern me that I thought might be interesting to examine. Now that I have over a decade under my belt, I confidently claim to be a veteran homeschooler. More over, I have spent a great deal of time researching and learning about educational philosophies and curriculum, and have gotten to know hundreds of homeschoolers both online and in person.
The first trend that concerns me is that there are so many eager parents of toddlers who are now “homeschooling.” Each week I stumble across a new blog where a parent is stressing over lesson plans for their two and three-year olds. Some post plans that are so complicated and thorough that they make me uncomfortable and worried.
You see, I have been there, with two kids under five, and I cannot imagine how one could seriously think they could implement that many items into one day, or even one week. Toddlers are curious little people with short attention spans. They thrive on routine and repitition. They have their own way of looking and absorbing the world around them.
I fear that in their enthusiasm, new homeschooling parents may be forgetting that toddlers are not a bucket into which to pour facts. More attention should be paid to their developmental goals and emotional well-being than to enter the race toward early writing and reading.
Pre-school is to be exactly that….before actual school. Kids should have the freedom to explore the outdoors without the pressure that every bugs and flower will be turned into a science lesson. Sometimes, it is a wonderful thing to be curious on one’s own. Toddlers should feel no worry in doodling, that each time they touch a crayon they will be pushed instead to make letter shapes.
For what message are we inadvertantly sending….that the child isn’t doing anything good enough on their own. If we try to make every minute of every day a teaching moment, our poor kids will never have time to breathe and wonder and imagine on their own. What we will be creating are not independent and confident thinkers, but children who are insecure and stressed.
I list a few here as good examples of how to homeschool preschool. I link to them here to give a perspective of a healthy approach to preschool at home.
Nina at Painted Rainbows and Chamomile Tea has a wonderful focus on books with her preschooler. She reads constantly to her children and has made the library her personal friend. Instead of millions of lessons, she focuses instead on developmental skills (cutting, coloring in line, etc) to give KitKat a balanced, age appropriate experience.
Sara at The Learning Umbrella is another exceptional pre-homeschooler. Not only does she teach her two children, but she also provides some lessons for the handful of kids in her at-home daycare. She is a bit more structured in her approach, using lots of themes and unit study methods. Yet, she is still focusing on short lessons and lots of free play and independence.
Kate of Homeschooling in the Garden State does a great job of intregrating her daughter’s interests with lots of outside activities. This is so important for preschool children. One of the most important skills children can learn at this age is how to share and get along with other children, and the dynamics within a family will not often resemble real-world situations. By providing lots of opportunities, Kate ensures the development of social skills.
I don’t want anyone to think that I am writing this just to criticize. I am not trying to burst anyone’s bubble or enthusiasm. I instead want to remind these gung-ho newbies that homeschooling is much more marathon than race.
It is hard to maintain the same focus and energy for ten, fifteen, twenty years. But you may be called to do that if you choose this lifestyle. For that reason alone, I encourage you to PACE YOURSELF. Don’t set yourself or your kids up to a crazy standard that will become impossible to maintain once they are in high school, or when all of your brood is at different levels and you forced to do multiple planning.
Enjoy them while you don’t have the pressure of looming SATs or the distraction of social obligations. Trust me, you’ll thank me down the road!
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I am the mother of two wonderful children, ages 12 & 15, that I have been homeschooling using a blend of Charlotte Mason and unit studies for ten years. My hubby is a terrific dad, contractor and big kid, and we also have two furry, four-legged children others would call “dogs.” I am a total crafty mama, trying my hand at almost anything, and enjoying most.
You can also find me blogging at Homeschool Hacks. 
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Great post! I also get concerned when I hear about early academics. In fact we just decided to hold off on starting Savannah on her kindergarten curriculum. We tried a new church on Sunday and put her in the K-2nd class with Ellie. Savannah was scared of some of the topics they discussed. This confirmed what I had suspected–she needs more time to be little. I suggested to her that she take an extra year of preschool to just enjoy playing and reading books. She agreed! This brought me much relief as she has a September birthday and I wasn’t quite comfortable with the decision to start kindergarten yet. I just didn’t want to push her. So we will be doing some intro to letter and phonics but I am not even thinking about teaching her to read until next year. She will join us on our science and history explorations because that is just plain fun for her. I’ll be posting about this later this weekend and will be sure to link to your post here.
Thanks!
Jenny
I agree with your post. However, would you be offended if I also commented from the other side of the fence? I started doing formal lessons with my dd when she turned 3, as she had been asking for them for a while and that was as long as I could put her off. To her, academics was fun. It was her preferred way of spending time. She loved to read, write, do maths, do worksheets. She hated to play in the dirt and do other little kid games. I remember when I printed off a whole bunch of maths worksheets for when I eventually started teaching her, a year or so down the track, and she did them all that night. But I suffered HUGE guilt over introducing academics early, and kept it a secret from most people I know. Because there is so much opinion against early schooling. But it was necessary for my child. SHE pushed me. She would literally cry when I said school was over for the day, and beg for more. So while you are right that most homeschoolers are just over-eager, I hope my story can stand as sympathy to those who are responding, with whatever degree of reluctance, to the needs of their child.
You are also so right about the need to pace yourself as a home educator. I didn’t so much burn out as become seriously derailed when my dd’s learning style changed as she matured. I had to change just about everything to do with the way we did school. I think newbies need to recognise just how long and complex the long haul is.
Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
I so agree with this post. Kids need down time to just cut loose and let their imaginations run wild… to process and ponder and decide how new information fits into their lives… or to do nothing at all. I think healthy doses of “being a kid” really contribute to the large learning spurts, too. I saw this in action when we did a homeschool co-op with another family. The other mom was constantly pushing the kids and it led to nothing but frustration, lowered self-esteem and burn-out. I like to always leave mine wanting for a little more instead of begging me stop.
I’m another veteran HSer and completely agree with you. I’m usually a bit surprised and confused by this attitude. There’s plenty of time to be a “homeschool mom”, just enjoy being a “mommy” for a bit longer.
Thanks!
(p.s I found you through tag surfing)
I could have written this myself. I have had the same concerns. Charlotte Mason thinks a child should be allowed to play, outdoors as much as possible, until he’s seven! I agree with that. I think a lot of the reason we are seeing such early homeschooling is simply because mama cant wait to get started which of course is a good thing in that it shows mama cares, but on the other hand if mothers of preschoolers knew how fast their little ones will grow up I tend to think they’d just enjoy reading books and playing blocks instead of pushing their kids into formal learning.
My kids are still very young, and though I consider what I’m doing homeschooling I know that I’m the one getting an education. LOL I’m enjoying this time learning everything I can about homeschooling from the vetrans, which is part of my blogging – trying to express outloud what I’ve learned/am learning.
I am the audience to which you speak.I just stumbled across your blog via another homeschooler’s blog. I am very new to the whole homeschooling thing and whereas I started out thinking a plan was necessary I learned very quickly that there was really no point because trying to sit a 3 year old down and say “ok now lets do this” is nearly impossible (perhaps it is possible for some, definitely not possible for mine). Rather we go with the flow. We mostly go about our day, if I find something catches her interest I’ll supply her with things to pursue that interest, other than that our day is one very long Q & A. Thank you so very much for this post, I cherish the perspective and wisdom from the veterans out there. Thanks again (a million times over)
I guess I could be the topic of this blog post. I do agree with lots of things you pointed out, but I also see nothing wrong with offering my son a little more exposure to different things while he is learning and growing. I don’t expect him to be reading by age 3 or even have the edge up when he starts school. It’s just a fun way to spend a small part of our day.
It’s all part of the trend that children today are expected to know so much more academicly by age six than just a generation ago. So many young children are never given time to just BE children anymore. There is nothing wrong with structured lessons for the littles, but is this rush to formal academics coming at a price?
Blush. I want to read the comments and think about this for a bit but I wanted to say thank you for the bright compliment. I’ll be back later.
Very good observation and thank you for sharing your perspective. I did start doing things with my daughter when she was 3 1/2 and she enjoyed it but my son is another story in that he is not ready for some of those things and thankfully, he is my 2nd so I realize that he doesn’t have to be.
I think a great resource for just doing some other preschool stuff is Slow and Steady Get Me Ready by June Oberlander as it is full of fun things for parents to do with their toddlers/preschoolers yet expose them to different concepts. Letting children be children is the best advice because the time will quickly come when you wish they were back at this precious stage.
In Maryland, they are starting Pre-K for 4 year olds at some schools under the guise of getting the children ready to learn by 5 so that when the enter K they are ready and their true end goal is to have the kids do better on the state tests at Grade 3…absolutely ridiculous to make kids miss out on being children so they can be indoctrinated at a younger age in order to be better prepared for a test in 4 years.
Thanks for the linky love and vote of confidence Angela!
As usual, you have hit the nail on the head for me!
P will be starting Kindergarten this year, but my version
is much more like Kindergarten used to be, way more playing
than “worksheet”.
I know plenty of people around me will think I’m not doing enough, but I feel like kids are missing out on real childhoods these days and she has plenty of time to join the “rat race”, it shouldn’t start at 5.
I’m not sure what the right answer is for everyone else, but
I’m homeschooling so she can develop at her own pace,not just pass a test.;-)
Thanks for the compliment! And you’ve hit the nail on the head, as usual. Little ones need time to play and learn all the skills that we don’t include in “school”. Like all the gross motor they get from running around the climbing trees, the imagination that builds with dress up and fantasy play, and the building skills they get when they spend a day building forts.
I agree with you that little children shouldn’t be “pushed” into reading or math. They will learn best when they are ready. But if the child is excited and interested by it then I think there is no reason why it shouldn’t be part of their life.
Our circumstances are not typical but, like Patience, my daughter loves reading and other academics. Even as a baby she used to take board books into her crib to look at (and chew on.)
When she was two she would bring me book after book after book to read to her. And she wanted me to run my finger under the words and she wanted to sight on my lap so she could see the words. At the end of her second year she was reading and by four she was reading at a late elementary school level.
Like I said, I acknowledge that our situation is not typical. But I just wanted to put a few words forward for awareness that some children are not only ready but clamouring for what some call “academic learning.” And I hope that those of us dealing with these atypical children have your understanding.
Thanks
I totally agree with you. I have been homeschooling for about 7 years. I have seen the negative effects of parents pushing their young children into school to early. Let your child lead. I had one child reading at 5 and another reading at 7. Now, they are 13 and 12 and love being homeschool.
With my oldest DD, we were in the same situation as Patience and Jane Deau. (My primary regret with her early childhood is that I was sooo paranoid about being or appearing overzealous that I went too far in trying to be “normal.” See, we know you are out there thinking we’re doing it wrong! *wink*) With my youngest, now 4, I am waiting for interest, jumping on it when it comes, dropping things at the first sign of frustration or boredom. For her, I agree that “academics” can wait — indeed, I shudder at the stresses we would face by pushing my little Taurus too hard.
One thing I have noticed is how many homeschool groups in my area are heavily populated by people whose oldest child is under 5. (A prospective member came to a meeting with her first born, a 9 month old!) I often wonder why these families join up — I was heavily involved in a stay-at-home moms group up until last year (though I always worked part time from home), and we did the preschool and toddler-oriented playgroups and field trips I see in the homeschool groups oriented toward younger children. Is it just that people are choosing a particular non-mainstream lifestyle (e.g. Attachment Parenting) and want to get with likeminded folks as soon as possible?
I do wonder if the curriculum planning stems from a couple of sources: first, the desire to replicate a preschool program (which, ironically, is often designed to replicate a home setting but for a dozen or more children), and second, the need to know what one is going to do with *one’s self* all day. (Kind of as Summer suggested.) I know when I have referred to “curriculum planning” for DD4 it’s a matter of bringing some structure to my usual random days. Maybe add to that a desire to convince spouse, friends, or family that something worthwhile is going on at home?
As a vet, I agree wholeheartedly. For little ones playing is their work and their learning. I’ll be linking to this post.
Another very common rookie mistake is when parents try to copy a regular classroom in their home. They have anxieties over whether they can do the job as well as the classroom they just pulled their child out of. It’s very cool when newbies grasp the idea that learning possibilities are incredibly varied and often have little to do with a traditional classroom.
I have noticed too that the homeschool groups I move in are mostly poulated with kids 5 and under. My fifth grader hates going to homeschool park days and such because the kids are so little so we dont go much anymore. Where are the homeschoolers of the older kids? I think they are not at the park days or at all the extra curriuclar things because they are hip deep in the trenches of learning and education. So in a way I guess its okay to start the kids out young. Those of you with young children enjoy your time with those kids. I think the term homeschool may be a bit premature for mothers of young kids, but at least it shows mothers who are involved, which is always a good thing.
Another veteran chiming in to agree. I believe the push to early academics ultimately hems children in by contributing to a gradual loss of self-direction, creativity and initiative, not to mention early burnout — kids who are tired of math and history by age 6 or 8. And this is coming from someone with kids who are very academically-minded, two of whom were reading at three, all of whom were quite advanced in mathematical reasoning and computation by age 4. We still didn’t do any lessons until age 6 or so.
Oh my gosh, you hit the nail on the head with this one! I am continually amazed when a mom writes in to one of the online boards, all aflutter about which curriculum to use, A or B, only to discover, upon asking, that her hsing child is “going on 3.” Good gravey! Whatever happened to just letting little ones be little?
I wonder how many of these early hsing moms are working with their first child? Folks do seem to lighten up with #2 and above.
Wow! You really hit a hot button with this one, Angela! Good Golly, look at all these comments! Almost as much chatter as a Harry Potter post, or a spanking post (but not as violent-those non-spankers can be so touchy!LOL! Just kidding, of course)
You are totally right, btw.
[...] Crone recently brought up a trend that’s a bit disturbing for her: lots of organized homeschooling for preschoolers. [...]
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A very lovely post, thank you.
To the poster who asked why there are so many under 5 families who join homeschool groups–it’s because so many kids are in preschool. My son is 3.5 and his playdates and playgroup park days are dwindling because more and more kids spend their days at preschool. One is going 8-3, 5 days a week! I can’t even imagine.
Wonderfully said! I have only just found this but love it.
Here’s one of my favorite pages on the issue, with veteran HSers’ advice about “teaching” in the early years: http://www.redshift.com/~bonajo/early.htm
To parents who say that their children push them for the schooly stuff, I suspect that there is more to the story if they’d dig a little deeper. Many little ones are eager to please their parents and love the praise and approval they get from masting academics. Others just love the TIME spent with mom or dad and would happily ask for more algebra, Russian lessons or floor scrubbing if it involved a happy, present parent making it seem wonderful.
Just a thought!
Also, nobody is saying not to help small children learn. It’s wonderful to read and explore and talk and all of that together. It’s the overstructured, planned, sit-down-and-learn-this stuff that gives many of us the heebie-jeebies. Children in a rich environment (meaning lots of books, nature, art, imagination and interaction) become marvelously brilliant without any of that business all on their own.